Home from the beach...home to where the house seems so huge again after the caravan and I notice how many toys and un-necessary items we actually have and yet can not seem to part with. Home to be alone and home to be together with just us again which is nice some of the time. We had a great time at the beach. The weather was not fantastic but it meant more inside time and more time figuring out what to do with the kids and they were close rather than spread out. The time went quickly and when it was time to come home, I actually wanted to stay a few more days. The kids love being at the beach with their friends and family. I love seeing them happy and busy. We were unable to let go of the lantern I took with us due to the weather so this was a bit disappointing.
S gifted me a lovely bracelet the other day...totally out of the blue and a very nice suprise. It is crystals with a variety of healing abilities and also a little 'G' pink heart on it. Thank you very much for that S!!!
I purchased some more images from Carly-Marie who had a special price on sunset images and quotes. I can use these for my scrapbooking or simply just as images. I surround myself with anything that I can to acknowledge that Grace is part of our lives but also to help me 'connect' with her.
I had a conversation with someone a while ago about money and babies and choosing what to do....I am at the conclusion that if you really want another baby then TRY to make it happen...dont worry about the money because there is ways and means of getting that money or making sacrifices if you really want the baby....life is more important and worth more than having money in the bank.
"If you haven't experienced what I have, then dont say "I know how it feels"
If you haven't had to make the decisions that I have, then dont judge
If you haven't felt the pain I have from losing a baby in the way we did, then dont say "it just wasnt meant to be"
If you haven't wanted something so bad and then had it all taken away, then dont pretend you know how it feels
If you choose to ignore me because you dont know what to say, then I may just choose to walk away from you and not look back
If you cant support me, then dont, and dont feel like you have to
If you want to say something, then simply acknowledge my loss and then let me talk and listen without judging me
If you have talked to me about babies or anything to do with babies and I have not responded or seemed interested, it is because this is too painful for me
If you think I am sad, then it is because I am
If you think I am angry, then it is because I am
If you think I am scared, then it is because I am
If you think you can help, then please do
If you are my friend, you will still be in my life, you will be still loved by me and you have helped me through the darkest days of my life".